"Impossible! No one is faster than Express Man!"
Express Man claims to be one of the very fastest robots around. A Robot Master to the core, Express Man turns his incredible speed and agility toward various types of larceny as entertainment. One of his favorite activities is to run in and out of a place to cause simple, petty mischief. Not so much malicious as easily bored, Express Man trusts in his speed to keep him away from any negative consequences. Express Man's trust is often misplaced. His primary weapon, the Solar Cannon, fires highly energized radiation that even he cannot outrun. Impatient and entirely unsubtle, Express Man is dangerous at any speed. His pride in his speed often puts him in dangerous situations.
Pat Lee Knees, Dull Surprise, Speed Mildly Inconveniences, Actual Weakness: Extended Leg, The Reason We Will Not Reinstate The Velocity Stat, Michael Mach Herman
- Yeah, he's from the Dreamwave comic that almost nobody read. Go fig.